She'll be back

PS: Sadly for us Purdie Pie, senorita Mia has moved on from the jungle making her way back to home to be with her brother for the birth of his first child.
It has been amazing to share this experience with such a solid sister. Her assistance and support will be missed. Love you Purde's (Photo of Mia above)

Playing the game

Hey crew

It has been a while since the last Peru update and much has happened on the journey. All in all it has been mostly positive I am happy to report.

As I sit here now I am feeling the strain of this process and so is Mum. Especially after this last week which I will share with you now.

It is amazing in this place, the people and the influences and what draws them together on an energetic level. This I realize is general in life. Some people are brought in to nurture your experience and others are brought in to test you. Be it tolerance or acceptance they stand there clear as day reflecting who YOU really are.

As we are experiencing such heighten sensitivity as a result of working with these medicines plants these sensations are multiplied by hundreds it feels especially when it is happening on a daily basis. It can really start to take it out of you.

Saying this, it is a revelation also to really see and feel these very patterns. Breaking them down and being shown a relationship that is possible with the self.

I am boldly speaking as a collective here because these are the kinds of conversations I am having with people who are doing the similar work in the jungle. Be it having one Ayahuasca ceremony as they pass through on their tourist trail or people whom like us have committed to creating a bond with the medicines to cure all aspects of themselves and their relationship with spirit, Mother earth and her living creatures. Some get it and some don't.

It is all perfect it seems.

I didn't say easy of fun, but perfect.

So this week after five frustrating days for Mum dealing with hospitals and Doctors the news today is that Lakshmi has had a CT scan here in Iquitos. We were curious about the amount of shrinkage of the tumors and wanted to compare a scan now from the ones she had six months ago. It was an initial feeling that this could be the time it may take for a curing. Also to show Otilia and Dr Jose who we had met three months ago interested in seeing Mum after this period of working with the plants and Otilia.

Mum was left a little disappointed as the tomography did not give accurate measurement just guidelines of the tumors size. However what was shown to be clear was that the Metastases (small alive cancer) on the left lung has been DEACTIVATED. This was the word the doctor used and he stated this to be very hopeful and positive news. On the report they had re labeled the Metastases a Granuloma. (Meaning that the active tumor on the lung had started to calcify)

It has been very clear to Mum, myself and Oitilia that there is shrinkage of the tumor in her left breast from the work conducted with these natural practices in the jungle. So we are very confident in the curing process working so far.

The interesting thing that I noticed and would like to share is that as soon as Mum got involved with more medical intervention her frustration and fears arose, She was exposed to cancer photos, language of unfavorable diagnosis mixed in with chaotic energies of cities and hospitals gradually broke her down. She went from this powerful vibrant jungle Jane to a frail and frazzled vessel in a very short time. So we wont be doing that again. Hmmmm!!! What is that saying you reckon?

You will be happy to know she is back out in the Jungle now. Back in nature with her plant friends nature spirits. Everyone knows how good you feel in nature.

Bottom line is that the jungle and the plants have been caring for her so well that it would be ridicules for her to return home now and face all of these hospital energies back in Sydney. As grueling as her jungle routine is this is the choice she has made and her dedication to the work has very much humbled me as I have been attempting to do my own work. The jungle is a hard place. She wants to return home totally clear of this cancer as planned. I couldn't agree more and I will be here supporting her and this decision all the way no matter long how it takes.

I am so ready to come home and be with you all again but cancer is still present and it could even take up to a year realistically.

Donna Otilia cured herself of a cancer some years back and it took her over a year to do so. I have heard from other Shaman's this work taking up to 6 to 8 months at best.

It is coming up to the 6 month mark for Lakshmi and I personally was hoping this would have been the time to come home as I had booked our return date for the 2nd of July. wishful thinking really. Can you blame me. Bottom line is we can return now and Lakshmi can be given some dried herbs and continue massaging the tumor and do the work herself. But very honestly that is not the same thing as having a very nurturing environment like she has here and an on tap plethora of fresh plants to diet on.

So it looks like we are staying funds depending.

Sending love to all from the Amazon.

Roberto

Flower baths and chainsaws

Hello friends

This week I turned 34. Not that I am someone who has ever really embraced the whole birthday age thing but there was a poignancy in this day that I felt to share that really sums up the random daily experiences I am having here in Peru.

My day started with a flower bath. A ritual I come to familiarize myself with working with Curandera’s in this country. Usually this pleasurable experience happens prior to ceremonies and treatments. This one was different however, as a close friend of mine gifted me with the flowers as a birthday present. This gift had such a profound effect on me, as the flowers seemed to have the scent of my family and friends. I prepared the flower bath the previous night under the stars and sang in the noisy silence of the Amazons nocturnal creatures and insects. I tugged at flower petals dropping them into the water filled bucket and allowed the unforced sounds of harmony to release from my throat. Emotions rose and I cried for the first time since this whole thing with Mum started. I cried for my pain physical and emotional, I cried for my family and my friends. I cried for the Amazon and the ignorance of it’s people who are destroying it in blatant ways and cried for the potential of loosing Mum.

It was weird as it wasn’t about the cancer taking her but more about her story of traveling out to the retreat the day before on one of the crazy over packed and over stacked mini buses. The driver who was falling asleep at the wheel had a near miss with a little boy on a push bike who had veer into the middle of the road and to avoid the kid the bus had to run off the road into a muddy ditch. A potentially fatal situation that shook up even the most fearless Peruvian. Those emotions that were injected into her body in that incident some how transferred themselves onto me and I was now a conduit for tears. I sang and cried and sang and cried into the night until there was only song left and that is what still remains today. The song of the earth that I feel so deeply.

I didn’t dream that night.

I awoke on my birthday to the thought off washing away my fogginess with that flower bath of tears. I am now 34, my Christ age now behind I was able to reflect back on my year of 33 and what I noticed was that me being in service to my family and community my greatest potential on this planet was revealed to me.

After my bath I made one for Mum and resided for a light breakfast of rice and eggs in the dinning Tambo. I practiced a bit of Spanish with Mum and went back to my hut to chill in the hammock and work on a peace of timber I had been widdling. (Very old man styles I know.)

After a couple of hours I was summons by Otillia’s son Neno to be with Mum for one of her treatments. For the past 4 days Mum had a resin plaster smeared over the largest tumors on her left breast. This was to draw the tumor to the skins surface. Nearly everyday for the past 7 weeks Otillia has been working on this area intensively with massage. The idea to break the cancer away from the breast wall and excrete it by force out of her nipple. Well as I sat witness I watched and felt this process happen. The top section of the tumor broke away from of the breast wall and was moving down into a position behind the nipple. Then Otillia would squeeze and rub the tumor forcing it to seep out of the pores of her nipple. This amazingly didn't seem to hurt Mum even though she was using a lot pressure. Everybody was very excited by this and Mum was able to weep with joy as her hard work is paying off. The pain of the treatment hits her later on when resting but she deals with it gracefully and great-fully.

Now one of the things that have amazed me with these South American dudes is their ability to build their homes from the natural habitat. Their constructions are very simple but effective. The houses we live in are called Tambo’s. The frame work are straight sapling trees. The floor and walls are boarded planks and the roof is made with weaved leaf thatched roofs. When I first arrived I often pondered on how the got their materials in as the timber factory are miles away and to carry these massive 25 x 15 x 3 meter planks from the main road through the jungle into camp would be a mission and a half.

The answer to these questions were answered however when Neno produced from under his bed (of course) the biggest chain-saw I have ever seen in my life. This Hasqivana beast has a blade over a meter and a half long.
He and a couple of worker mates would head of into the Jungle spend three hours making alot of noise and the come back huffing and puffing with two of these planks freshly cut on their back using a interesting system of tying a support rope around their foreheads to balance the massive weight with the neck muscles.

Intrigued by how they actually cut these slabs with this massive thing. I figured that on my birthday I would just ask if at some time they would show me how they use a chain-saw.
In my broken Spanish my translation must of come across as. “Can you show me how to mill a tree now.” With massive smiles on their faces and the enthusiasm of kids with a new xmas toy they jumped up and started oiling their pride and joy and sharpened its blades. They sent me off to put some boots on and were waiting for me on the path to show me what they do best.
I have to admit I was enjoying my day of nothingness but the enthusiasm of these guys to share their knowledge and skills I couldn’t refuse. They wouldn't of understood me anyway.
Half an hour later I’m wielding this massive tool, cutting blanks for the next Tambo that is in construction. The paradox hit me whist watching Neno in his thongs (might I ad) hacking into this once great tree. There is such a fine line between living and dying. In order for Neno and his family to live they need to kill this tree. This seems to go for all of us in all our homes. This was the closest I have ever come to this process and in this way I feel alot closer to the earth. There seem to be an understanding from this particular tree of it’s purpose. I suppose it is just like killing an animal yourself before you eat it instead of just buying from the supermarket. In this way there is a chance to thank what you are killing so to serve your purpose on this planet.
If in fact this can be just.
The parody of existing as a human being slapping me in the face again.
So I sang a song to the earth an retired from my duties.

I took another bath had, some lunch and resided into some sleep. Awoken by the dinner bell on dusk, I donned my mozzie armor and joined Mum for dinner. Mum had a thought there was some kind of surprise awaiting me but dinner was more rice and eggs so there was no surprise there and the camp was empty except for a couple of the working staff.

We enjoyed each others company a pretended the candle in the middle of the table had a cake under it and I blew it out. I was tired and ready for bed when the family arrived home. They had gone into town to get takeaway chicken, rice and chips. Now town is nearly two hours away some you could imagine the state of the chips sitting in a polystyrene box were in. There gesture was so sincere. They were so beautiful they had even made me the biggest chocolate cake with
Feliz Compleanos Roberto written on top.
(Happy Birthday Roberto) and Neno the comedian place one of those never go out candles in the middle so everybody got to have a big laugh as I struggled to blow it out. Such simple humor but such joy. They showered me with gifts and so I gave back with guitar and song. Otillia went and got her tape recording device to record some of my songs. So now on some quiet nights I here them playing me loud and distorted (just the way they like it over here) on their little tape player. It’s all a bit surreal hearing yourself in the distant jungle on the radio.

In some way we are a part of this family now and they a part of ours. I hope the future allows this connection to stay close as I hope some of you my friend will have the privilege to experience something similar to this in your lives. It’s what enriches our soul that are the true riches we have. Right now I feel loaded.

I hope to here from you guys soon. If the diagnosis is correct Mum and I should be back in Australia in 5 weeks. Can’t wait to catch up.

Muchos Love
Roberto

Treatments

Hola friends and family Lakshmi here.

Tonight I find myself by myself in a cafe in Iquitos it is 9pm Sunday 27th April. I have left the jungle to spend two nights here to attend to phone calls, emails and personal matters that have been needing attention for some time now.
Iquitos is a manic noisy place which of course i have avoided for months now but Rob has managed to find a quiet oasis to overnight. Gotta say, already I feel the jungle calling me back.

Rob is out somewhere enjoying a birthday dinner and a catch up with Purdie(Mia) He celebrated his 34th birthday on Wednesday last out at Otillia’s.( Otilia is the Curandera (healer) i am working & living with) It was a beautiful night of song dance and warm companionship where communication was straight from the heart ( our Spanish is limited and they speak as has much English.) We have it all on film with Otillia recording Rob’s singing on her voice recorder. Nino her son carried a giant chocolate cake from Iquitos, thru the jungle and presented it to Rob.(so much for the no sugar diet)I could only stomach a mouthful it was too full on!
The night was delightful as everyone sang a tune and i danced a dance. Otillia was going off with her songs...

It is the middle of Week 7 which means within Otilia’s timeframe, I am due to complete treatment here in another 5 weeks.
Let’s rewind here.....After I had completed 1 month of treatment with Otilia, she stated she saw the treatment continuing for another 2 months. She says she would send me home ,or off with medicines and instructions for the future including continuing the breast massage myself.

I am aware many of you are wanting to know how i am feeling and healing.
It is only now that i have had the strength to share some of this remarkable experience online with you.

There is an immensely powerful collaboration between the curative power of the plant medicines, Otillia the Curandera, and my faith in the Divine guidance supporting this magnificent process. I am honored to bear witness to this Everyday.

Most days I have a treatment, which can include an ingestion of a drink or an application of many different plant medicines.
During the first four weeks the aim of the healing was to get my circulation functioning normally.
I had painful and powerful massages (you know the ones where you cry and laugh at the same time) body scrubs, floral baths and medicine to eliminate toxins from liver and skin. For weeks my legs were purple with the change going on my skin peeled off just like a snake and i now have a brand new layer and my circulation functioning normally. This initially treatment was of fundamental importance before the next stage could commence.
Along with this were daily breast massages, to get the blood flowing in the breast and surrounding tissue. then came the various medicine poultices for my breast tumors. A major part of my day for weeks was to lay down and apply for up to two hours many different and fascinating medicines mixtures to the tumors. mostly these medicines were bright green and cold assisting in cooling and extracting the heat from the massaged tumors. somedays they were very organic, muddy dark red and their function was to break up the tumors. After their applications i was instructed to spend hours of post resting where a Major part of the healing takes place.
There were days when i felt the tumors great resistance in being disturbed! these were challenging treatment times indeed!

Ayhauasca is not part of her treatment plan for me. Otilia has suggested if i want to i can have a homeopathic dose when my body is stronger. The most intense ingestion has been Otelia's power medicine called Wakapurana....a powerful purgative. It clears you quickly and Violently with vomiting and diahorrea, all to cleanse your system for the work ahead. Wakapurana worked so quickly for me .......hours after taking this medicine, i could not stand up as i was too weak and dizzy so Otelia massaged me on the floor, normally i am treated sitting up ( old blood appeared leaking out from my nipple. Otelia was excited saying muy rapido¡ meaning this medicine worked so fast in me.
So this began weeks of removing the blood and infection from the constricted vein and tumor.

Two weeks back O explained to me and to Simon that this stage Now is what she calls the Ultima (final stage) where the really strong work begins. ........and yes, it has begun...... the massages have been most uncomfortable (as the massage penetrates deeper into the tumor)its the after pain that has been very excruciating.

I will explain.

Otilia saw and felt the vein leading into the tumor site was like a rock with no oxygenated blood flowing thru it. she has massaged this until it was too painful to withstand but it is functioning again. O sees the tumor as a ball of flesh, all matted and knotted like a tangled ball of hair and the therapeutic action of the medicine and her massages is untangling this fleshy mass that medicos call a cancerous tumor. It is all necrotic (dead) tissue ,as no blood has been circulating in there for who knows how long. .........as i mentioned it is muy muy painful but effective. So Otilia now uses the medicines that draw out the dead material from the tumor.
She says it will All just come out through the nipple and i am watching this happen everyday. (which is what Ysabel Curandera in Chiclayo told me would happen that the cancer would eventually come out thru my body)

With the tumor in the left breast attached to the breast wall, the medicos had grave concern and mastectomy was part of their treatment plan. I am able to report that the tumor is detaching itself from the breast wall and what Otilia had foreseen ie the melting away and untangling is apparent. The tumor is slowly shrinking. and the area is softening.

I lost weight with the stress of the diagnosis period and although i have gained some. I look forward to gaining much more.....its hard here as i am not fond of peruvian fare......i miss the fish i like to eat ...so fish(sometimes Piranha) rice fijoles eggs and vegetables that i don't normally choose to eat are on my plate. Luckily i can pick custard apples pawpaw and bananas daily and there is no salt and no sugar in the diet....i miss my milk and my chai! and my family and friends

My clothes are all trashed from the jungle damp and medicine stains and my beautiful sarongs are rat eaten......I am covered in insect bites. (Liz Thompson knows about dealing with this one!) my hair was cut off really short, no style....blond is all gone ! I daily remove the dirt from my nails, my vain self would just love a pedicure/manicure and a chat with my amiga, Kerry Gilmore and my color and fave cut from my amiga, Justine, love to you guys.
BUT hey!
I feel really strong in the body and spirit
My body has gone through an powerful transformation ........and now I sense another level is in process.

In the first few weeks in the jungle i found it difficult to deal with being isolated, after spending Months with my posse.
Rob and Dan had gone up the Amazon on their important journey to see their father in Brazil. Purdie was now off on her own journey and to look after her father and brother who had arrived to also work with the Medicines. Liz had already extended her stay and she and Simon were spending time in Iquitos getting the final interviews they needed, logging tapes for the documentary before she returned to her family in Australia. Simon was also flying down to Lima to collect his family and bring them to Iquitos.
So I had a block of time alone for contemplation of my reality.

In the weeks i have been here there have been people come and go on Tuesday and Fridays for Ayahuasca ceremonies, along with the amazing people doing their physical healing’s for different time periods. My son Dan returned from Brasil and did an 8 day period cleansing his system with the plant medicines then sat in ceremony a few more times before returning home. I had the pleasure of the company of an amazing brother and sister Eka & Nikki from the US who were on their healing journey together. There was the adventurous kiwi bro Elliot, Yves, a soulful french canadian bro, a young man with a beautiful heart by the name of Derrick, most recently a very lovely man called John(Juan joined us) he lives in Canada and has come work with the Medicines ......of course the delightful Carlos who appears on a regular basis bringing most of these people to meet with Otelia and Ayahuasca where he co faciltates O’s ceremonies

As difficult as the early stages were out here i now feel like this is home and feel strange/disturbed when not in nature with my new family. The rustic living conditions took a bit to get used to and i do have a laugh at myself at times when i remember the types of accommodations i have enjoyed in my many travels........this place is the antithesis of the 5 star hotels and houses and of course the 7 star experience of the late Kerry Packer’s super yacht the Artic P! Just as that was an experience of a many lifetimes this life experience here is equally as unforgettable.

I have negotiated with the family of rats living in the tambo roof, the bats that occasionally accidently lose their way and even with the mosquitos and ALL the other insects that have relentlessly bitten me daily.......we are now all at peace! It rains almost everyday and the thunderstorms are spectacular over this region. Everything gets damp and mouldy......but again have made peace with this fact.......It is raw and earthy and i have grown used to it all as i have grown raw and earthy and very vulnerable along the way...........

I am now find myself in tears as i write those last lines as this is my truth..........i sign off now and send Love from the Amazon and this space of my open heart.

Lakshmi Love
Deb

PS: I forgot to mention that many nights i swing in a hammock awaiting the cowbell sound for my spartan meal watching the sunset over the jungle with the iridescent blue and green chested hummingbirds flying about in the trees nearby and the giant dragonflies buzzing in front of the tambo (the insects seemed to be much larger here) including the tarantula’s and up here a these times, i often think and miss my home, family and friends and then i think of how i will miss the sound and sights of this home and family i love here when i return.

Something strange about this family

Hi Guys

Dan and I arrived back in Iquitos two days ago. Like I had said before we left that it was time for us to reunite with our father Ron whom has solo sailed his way from Australia on his second circumnavigation of the world. If he makes it back to Australia on this trip he will be the first Australian to sail solo around the world both ways.
We are also very fortunate even to have been able to visit him alive. On his voyage around Cape Horn, down near the South pole he was struck by two low pressure systems which turned the waters he was sailing into jagged mountains. He was struck by a rouge wave and his boat was cap sized snapping his mast off. He was fortunate to be hit by another rouge wave that turned him back up right. The next 6 days are what true survival stories are all about as he rounded the cape and found anchorage at the bottom of the world and began the rebuild of his boat in freezing conditions. This was a far cry from the place he lives now on a beautiful tropical island called Galleao in Brazil.

Dan and I have had an amazing round trip. We traveled by speed boat 8 hours up the Amazon from Iquitos to the Peru/Columbian/Brazil tri boarder. This is were we stamped out of Peru and into Brazil. Then it was planes and ferries and buses for the next four days to reach Ron on his island paradise . We enjoyed simple life with the locals. We visited Babylon tourist mecca of Morrow San Paulo and danced down the streets following a gorgeous all girl samba band in Salvador. We cruised the beaches of Copacabanna, Rio and in the city of San Paulo we even found the only vegetarian all you can eat restaurant in the whole of South America and all in two weeks.

The time with our father was a big part of our families healing process. As I had mentioned I had not seen my Dad in 5 years and Dan 3. I was reminded that even though our family has never really been close. I realized I actually do have a family and this is a blessing. Deepening this connection is what I am striving to work hard towards. Mums condition has brought us all to this point. At least in this life time there is awareness being discovered. Still long ways to go but I am inspired and emotionally moved more than ever by my parents.

The day Dan and I arrived back to Iquitos we meet back up with Simon. It was great to see his wife Joe and his little girl Ruby that have now joined him finally here.

We were hanging to see Mum so Simon said he would join us on a trip out into the Jungle. We hired two motor scooters and bravely took on the traffic of Iquitos and the 50km ride out to Mum’s location. We enjoyed a enthusiastic walk into camp.
Sensing the work that has been going on with Mum, we stopped just before entering the retreat for Simon to conducted a smoke clearing on us, as we didn’t want to bring in anything unwanted into Mum’s healing space. It was amazing how clean we felt after Simon's offering.
We so ready to see Mum now.

We rocked up to the little village and we were greeted by Mum’s Curandera Physician. They all seemed happy to see us back. Mum was having lunch at the time so that’s where we meet her in the dinning Bungalow. She had had another hair cut and has quite noticeable lost weight but she was strong. Energetically she had strength. Her eyes were radiant and her smile delicious. There were also three young Americans staying out there at the retreat with her doing there own treatments. I was glad to see this just to know she wasn’t completely alone was comforting.

As we arrived in the late afternoon our stay was to be brief as we had a long journey back and the idea of ridding around this city at night puts a whole new meaning to that word extreme.
Give me BASE jumping any day.

Mum spoke about her treatments of body rubs with sugar and grated potatoes. Dan called it the hash brown rubdown. She then took us on a tour of the trail to her Bungalow showing us all the plants she has had treatments with. The water hole where she has her floral baths and her new solo tambo. A very humble abode where she has been staying for the past two weeks. There has been major changes in the size of her tumor and a lot of purging of fluids from the areas of concern. She seems happy to be where she is. The poor darling is covered in insect bites and has been told it will probably be another 6 weeks work where she is.

Dan and I will be joining her on Tuesday for the next week or so. There is ceremony planned with grandmother Ayahuasca on Tuesday. So the journey of deepening continues.

You should here from us in a week to keep you up to date with Lakshmi’s progress.

Love to all.

Roberto

Message from Mum

Hola Everyone

This is Lakshmi emailing on behalf of Roberto on the eve of my departure to the jungle.

Yesterday, i went into Iquitos to have an interview with a medical doctor that Simon had arranged for Liz to film at a botanical research centre in Iquitos. ( research centre for traditional medicine)
In the botanical garden we were eating and filming the medicinal plants of the Amazon and Northern Peru. I feel this lovely man/medico will feature strongly in the documentary as he has much to share about the medicines in respect to research and treatment of disease. He gave a most lucid and emotional description of his own personal experience with Ayahuasca. He asked for me to come see him at his clinic in a month after i finish my work on a special diet with the female healer Ayahuascera found recently in the jungle.

After driving for hours out of Iquitos with a stop for some coconut juice we finally found where to she studied my breasts and lymph and lung and said i will need to stay up to 3 weeks or longer working hard every day with medicines baths washes and emplastos (herb brassiere and be on a special diet called dieta no salt no sugar no meat!

Hope to let you know more at the end of this treatment.

Love you Lakshmi

Ayahuasca Dreaming

Hola Peoples

(Due to the importance of this operation and the interference that we have experienced on the journey so far some names of people helping us wont be mentioned until the healing has been complete)

The last message I left with you all was that we were all off to have our first Ayahuasca ceremony last week. You may be wondering if we have actually made it back from that journey.

Well the answer is we made it but only just now am I getting my feet back from the onslaught of experiences I have had since that last Ceremony. I will go more into this in a moment. The update is that we have found the woman who will help mum to heal. This will be quite a"vigorous routine" her quote, of special diet, herbal treatments, massage and isolation. Mum is now out in the Amazon Jungle. She is staying at the Shamans humble retreat a good distance away from the city and a 25 min walk in from the main road. Her accommodation consist of a raised hut above the ceremony space called a Tambo, where we drank the Ayahuasca the other night. As Mum's condition is weak at the moment the opportunity for her to drink has not arisen but she is as close as she can be to the medicines.

Getting There

So last Friday we all when out to meet this woman healer and see how Mum felt about this opportunity that Simon presented to her. Simon and Liz meet us at our hotel and the 6 of us squished into a taxi. Poor Purdie, Mia had come down with a fever over night so it was going to be an interesting journey for her. As we left the hustle and bustle of the city we finally started to get the taste of clean air and green freedom. A familiar sense of being back on the North Coast arose, as the rain-forest starts to sing from outside the vehicle. The deeper we got into this jungle space the more the clouds began to form, until we were engulfed in a major down poor. This was going to be interesting indeed especially for those with out wet weather gear or shoes. The decision to press on was made and by the time we arrived at the start gate for the walk in the rain had mellowed and so we eased our way into the jungle through the lushes canopy's and sound of foreign insects welcoming us. We were greeted with hospitable smiles and a plate of food by our hosts. We were then shown to the bungalow where mum is now staying. Her new digs consist of three rooms with double beds and mozzie nets and a toilet. A veranda with two hammocks and that’s it. No electricity so no worries about a noisy tv's blaring from anywhere.

We rested for the afternoon as we waited for darkness as ceremony is usually conducted in total darkness. Mum met with the healer and a sigh of relieve followed as we watched them converse and consult Mum's condition. "No problem" she said. A wall of emotion showed us all we had made it to our destination. This is where the miracle will go down. I finally found some tears in this moment and slumped back into the hammock. Purdie was administer some plant juice which reduced her fever in instant and the feeling of being in good hands was agreed.

The Ceremony

Simon, Liz, Dan and myself drank along side three other folk that had been doing a week or so of ceremonies. The ceremony was conducted by our two host our new Shaman healer friend and an inspiring American guy who has dedicated the past 4 years of his life to working with these plants and to the (Icaros) songs which accompany the journey of healing.

The Ceremony was very intense even though it was Dan and my first time and we were told we would not be given too much but what ever we were given at some points of the trip I thought I was given to much. Rising through highs and lows struggling with the darkness struggling with my mind struggling with just my being, I realized I had to let go. I had to let go of caring for anyone. I had to let go of trying to hold onto to what every it was I was holding onto.

The Shaman songs began and so did the vomiting. Now I was told about the vomiting but I didn't realize just how important and imperative it was to let it out get it all out. It came from no where and from the pit of my toes it sometimes felt like. The release was amazing but at times painful as I was a bit de-hydrating and stomach cramps would stop me wanting to do more.
In turn I would suppress the urge when I could. NOT A GOOD THING. As my life has been about suppressing emotions and this is the ultimate opportunity to release them.

I get it now.

The visions were grand the songs were beautiful the experience way to hard to but into words maybe I'll write a song instead.

Not to go on to much but the day after the ceremony I came down with some flu symptoms that turned into be a throat infection, then Bronchitis and to top it off my blood test came back with Dengi fever. Yep Dengi. So the last week I have been ridding a 39+ fevers and I have a Peruvian doctor story for another time.

Right now Mum is in the Jungle safe and my brother and I are off to Brazil to visit our father whom I I haven't seen for 5 years. I here it is Carnival on Tuesday so timing seems good. I wont be corresponding in this time so you'll get the next update after I have seen Mum in a couple of weeks and let you know how she is doing.

Hope you are all well.

Peace and Surrender

Rob